Holly Madison Gets Her Hands on Hugh Hefner’s Baby Batter

As I’ve confessed on here before, I am an avid Girls Next Door fan. I am embarrassingly familiar with the grooming habits of Bridget’s dog, Wednesday, know that Holly is infatuated with Disney, and that Kendra’s laugh irritates me even more than people who don’t use turn signals. I’ve also read Bunny Tales so, based on my extensive secondary research, I can say with great certainty that Holly is a conniving wench. Team Bridget!

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So it is with heavy heart that I report Holly and Hef were spotted in the waiting room of a Beverly Hills gynecologist who specializes in in-vitro fertilization. Holly has made no secret that she would like to get pregnant with her meal ticket, er… with Hef’s baby, and it looks like things are moving in that direction.

Poor Hef. Holly probably told him she wanted to baste a turkey for his birthday, and the guy couldn’t tell the difference between her pink taco and a birthday turkey. Well, at least the child will be born into a totally healthy family: an 81-year-old father who’s also in diapers, has two other families and a wife to whom he’s STILL married; two other “mommies,” one of whom is also still married and the other with an I.Q. level of a baby; AND a mother who shaved her nose, stripped her hair of all color and implanted cantaloupes into her chest just to catch daddy’s eye!

But whose family tree doesn’t read like that, really?

Oooohhh… I can’t wait to watch Wednesday in her first modeling shoot on Sunday!